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In reply to an interesting blog written called “The House of Jaded Women” by Ms. Chianne Greer.
It’s not an impossibility or cosmic joke to have the love or things in your life that you want and deserve. The biggest issue we have as young people especially young black people is that we take God out of the decision making process when it comes to dating and we certainly remove the friendship component.
We jump to intimacy too soon bypassing the true “getting to know you” step that is so necessary in relationships. Proverbs says that “There are friends who destroy each other but a real friend sticks closer than a sibling.” In relationships how often have you had the destructive person in your life? The litmus test is when the person sticks by you no matter what. The true person who loves you will propel you to purpose and help you reach your God-given destiny while the wrong one will distract you and dissuade you from it. There are some people who feel as if they aren’t married by a certain age that their life is incomplete and they become jaded to the possibility of real happiness. As young men and women and even not so young men and women we must let that jaded mentality go. For the ladies you’re not an old maid at 27,29,33,35, or 38 and although it may seem impossible to believe there are some nice single brothers out here looking for “Mrs. Right too”… Just remember all things happen in God’s time and not your own… Be faithful and remember that you don’t know the plans God has for you but He has plans to prosper you, not harm you, give you the hope and future you deserve.
The focus should be on God and the work he has for you to do and everything else will fall into place. If you do things in good measure you’ll be blessed with the great things God has for you. Funny thing is do we have to stop giving God a grocery list cause all the things we want may not be best for us. They key is asking God for the best He has for us! God knows what you need and when you need it…
~jb~
“It’s not an impossibility or cosmic joke to have the love or things in your life that you want and deserve.”
In a time when women ARE becoming increasingly jaded because the desires of their heart seem to be escaping them, it’s nice to see and hear that there are still some YBM’s who desire the same things.
Thank You Jeff Beckham, Jr…….this is exactly what I needed and the exact time in which I needed it.
I am a widow of almost two years and last night was a very rough one for me. I’m one of the very few people who got marriage right on the very first try :0) and miss my husband/best friend very much; but I have been released to move on and have met someone who has become a very good friend.
He is a man who truly has a heart for God (as my husband did) and wants no compromise in his life. He too has been through a lot over the last two years and we recently since February have talked pretty much everyday….whether through email, chat, facebook or lunch or dinner. The foundation has truly been one of talking, listening and hearing; even problem solving together and praying together.
When you build a friendship first, you have the opportunity to see where each other’s weaknesses lie and how you may or may not be compatible, but also how to strengthen each other. Friendship touches the “intimate” part of the heart. When you move right into “intimacy” something is missing that you can’t recapture later on. Last night I was feeling like this “friendship” was not going to be what I would like it to be…..but God has seen fit to give me this very good friend and HE knows what is best. I only want God’s best for my friend as well as I know he wants God’s best for me. We may not be what God has planned for each other……but we can celebrate our friendship for what it is.
I just “happened” upon your notes..(nothing just happens….it was a God thing). :0)
So….thank you Jeff for you notes. It truly put my Saturday into perspective.